10 Ways to Fix a Broken Marriage without Counselling

You don’t need the help of a marriage counselor to fix your marriage if it’s broken.

There are many things you can do on your own, whether it’s spending more time together or setting rules for how to handle conflict in the home that will make all the difference in repairing your relationship and getting your marriage back on track.

1) Schedule time to talk

One of the best ways to fix a broken marriage is to make sure you’re spending quality time together. Schedule the time and place your focus solely on each other so that you can talk out all of your feelings, and address any underlying issues.

Communication is key in overcoming relationship problems, but it can only be done through face-to-face contact.

Set aside at least an hour every week or two to devote completely to each other, and use that time as an opportunity for focused conversation instead of watching TV or surfing Facebook.

The result will not only be happier spouses but one step closer toward fixing your broken marriage!

2) Give each other space

One of the biggest mistakes couples make when trying to fix their broken marriage is forcing conversations.

When you’re ready, give each other space, and don’t force uncomfortable conversations. It may take some time for both of you to start talking about how you feel—but letting things sit for a bit may help put things into perspective.

Eventually, one (or both) of you will start exploring issues that are bothering you because they have no other option than to take them out.

However, it could be days, weeks, or even months before anyone brings up anything substantial. You must remember—that you’re on your timeline in fixing your broken marriage without counseling.

3) Set up date nights

Date nights are an essential part of marriage, not only for romantic reasons but also because they help remind you why you wanted to spend your life with your spouse.

When children come along and responsibilities pile up, it can be easy to lose sight of your priorities, but regular date nights help bring those values back into focus.

It’s also important that you plan dates that cater to both partners; if one likes quiet evenings while another wants live music and dancing, make sure you find something that caters to both interests.

Avoid either-or thinking by working together on your plans instead—you might even realize there are things that each of you doesn’t like doing but enjoys watching together!

After all, building memories is what matters most when it comes to fixing broken marriages.

4) Reach out more often

Talking through your problems with your spouse, in person, is one of many key aspects of improving and fixing a broken marriage.

If you feel like your relationship is irreparable at times, try spending some time each day reaching out and speaking to your partner.

Let them know how you’re feeling and spend time getting to know their perspective as well. This may not fix everything, but it’s more likely than not to help you get on track and back into healthier patterns for both you and your spouse.

This can be done by sharing stories about how things were better when they were growing up in their families or when they were first married—and talking about what needs improvement today.

5) Listen more often than talking

Don’t wait for your partner to finish speaking before chiming in with what you have to say. Too often, couples talk over each other or one person dominates conversations so that their spouse doesn’t get much of a chance to speak.

When you listen, however, it shows that you care about your partner and encourages more open communication between you both.

If you notice yourself being more of a talker than a listener in your relationship, try simply listening more often than talking.

6) Take care of yourself before you reach out again

One of the biggest mistakes that couples make in trying to fix their marriage is waiting too long. Chances are that your partner is still hurting and if you want things to work out, it’s important not just to reach out again but also to focus on taking care of yourself.

One way to show your partner you’re serious about making things work again is by committing yourself wholeheartedly and focusing on having fun together.

And since many broken marriages result from one person having an affair, trying something new with your spouse will show them how much you’ve changed since those years when your relationship was on shaky ground.

7) Apologize for your own mistakes

Don’t make excuses. Be quick to admit fault, apologize, and ask for forgiveness when you hurt your partner.

And then immediately commit yourself to improve yourself—to make sure that it doesn’t happen again. It’s better for your relationship in the long run.

If you’re struggling with how to fix a broken marriage without counseling, you should always start by taking responsibility for your actions and apologizing sincerely and fully.

Otherwise, your spouse will likely become defensive and nothing productive will get done.

8) Forgive often, but don’t forget

Forgiveness is an important part of maintaining and rebuilding a strong marriage. It’s something you can (and should) practice every day.

The problem is, forgiving your spouse might feel like forgetting that they hurt you. Here’s how you can forgive someone while still remembering what they did:

First, define what forgiveness means for you. For some people, forgiving doesn’t mean forgetting; it simply means learning how to move forward despite painful memories or feelings.

For others, it requires both parties to let go of their anger and resentment and build a healthier relationship as a result.

Do some soul searching about your beliefs about forgiveness—you might be surprised by what you find out about yourself!

9) Spend less time with those who won’t help your marriage

There’s no easy way to get out of a bad marriage, but if you want your marriage to improve, start by spending less time with people who don’t help it.

If you and your spouse spend lots of time with family members who constantly criticize each other or put one another down, those negative behaviors will eventually rub off on you.

The same is true for friends; if you hang out with people who complain about their spouses all day long, they won’t help repair your relationship.

The more time you spend around people like that, the harder it will be for your marriage to survive in any kind of functional form.

10) Make it fun!

There are times when counseling is needed to bring two people together again, but that doesn’t mean couples can’t be proactive and make their marriage stronger.

If you’re reading these words, there may be issues in your marriage that need fixing. This list will help you take steps to resolve those issues and strengthen your marriage; if these don’t work for you or if things have gotten so bad that you can no longer speak civilly with your spouse, then it might be time for counseling.

But before seeking professional help (which might not be covered by insurance) try some of these ideas first. You may find that counseling isn’t necessary after all!