Parenting has become one of the major problems in the 21st century especially in the African setting because many parents are lacking the effective parenting styles and have since shifted their duties as parents to teachers in the schools of which most of the teachers are just implementing the curriculum without cultural and moral values.
In this article, we explore one of the ways of nurturing our children effectively to cope with the generational change and meet the status quo while maintaining cultural and moral uprightness in this our 21st century society; “Building a strong and friendly bond with our children while maintaining our role as a parent”
- Active Listening
Many parents have been busy with work to the extent that their children feel isolated and neglected and resort to so many vices which tends to paint a dark image on the personality of their parents. As parents, must Be Present for our children at all times despite our tight schedules, we must set aside quality time to listen to our children without distractions and always show genuine interest in what they say. We must Empathize with them by understanding their feelings and validating their experiences. We must let them know we care about their emotions.
- Open Communication
We must understand that the first point of contact our children is we the parent so we must operate on a safe space and encourage open dialogue by creating an environment where our children feel comfortable sharing thoughts and concerns. We must always engage them by asking Questions and showing curiosity about their day, interests, and feelings. We must ask open-ended questions to promote deeper conversations.
- Shared Activities
We do not function as bosses with our subordinates and children too so must make sure that we participate together with our children by also engaging in activities our children enjoy. Play games, cook, read, or explore hobbies together. We must discover common interests that strengthen our connection. It could be sports, movies, or art.
- Respect Their Autonomy
Our children are not our employers to be given commands without questioning the relevance of these commands we must give our children age-appropriate choices and respect their decisions even if they differ from ours. We must also dialogue and negotiate with them when setting rules or boundaries and also involve them in the decision-making process because they also have something to present onto the table
- Be Supportive
When even little efforts are gone unnoticed especially in the homes low self esteem tends to be increased in our children so as parents we must celebrate Achievements of our children, we must acknowledge their accomplishments, no matter how small. We must be their cheerleader. When things also go wrong we must be there to provide comfort during those challenges. We must be ready to offer emotional support during tough times and be a source of encouragement for our children. Check this resource: Veteran Reading Teacher Reveals The Proven Formula That Enables Any Parent To Easily Teach Their Child To Become An Amazing Reader.
- Model Friendship Behavior
We must be models in our immediate environment especially in the presence of our children by demonstrate kindness, empathy, and respect in our interactions with others because our children learn by observing. We must also inculcate the art of conflict resolution in our children by teaching healthy ways to resolve conflicts and to apologize when needed.
- Quality Time
Time is a valuable asset every child will cherish from a parent so we must as parents try everything possible to unplug by putting away screens and spend quality times face-to-face go for walks, have picnics, or simply chat. We must institute a bedtime ritual by using the bedtime as a bonding opportunity to share stories, discuss the day, and express love with our children.
- Be Authentic
Children at times see their parents as super naturals who doesn’t even face challenges and never make mistakes so we as parents must make our children feel our human nature by talking about our own life experiences, challenges, and feelings. We must also admit mistakes and apologize when necessary. It models humility and teaches accountability in our children.
Take note, friendship with your child doesn’t mean being their peer; it means being a trusted confidant, guide, and source of love. While being a friend, maintain your parental role—setting boundaries, providing guidance, and ensuring their safety Over time, your relationship will evolve, and your child will appreciate the balance between friendship and parental guidance
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Remember that effective parenting is dynamic, and it’s natural to use different styles in various situations. As parents, we do our best, recognizing our own limits. Each child is unique, so adapt your approach based on their needs and developmental stage keeping in mind that balance is key
In our next article we will delve more into the benefits of been a friend to our children as responsible parents
Mandelson Owusu
Child Educator
0541376059
nelsonmandela1805@gmail.com
